The strongest relationships are built on respect, trust and boundaries that are communicated (instead of crossed). An easily overlooked detail by even the closest couples, the knowledge of each other’s boundaries will help you avoid future arguments and understand past disagreements.
Although discussing boundaries sounds like a good idea for partners getting to know each other, it’s also a smart approach for any couple planning on sticking together for the long haul. By being mindful of your partner’s boundaries, you not only add value to your relationship, but also show your commitment. Read on to discover five boundaries to set that will allow your relationship to grow as much in health as it does in gratitude.
The Manner In Which You Argue
Regardless of how good your intentions are, arguments with your significant other are bound to happen. When this uncomfortable situation arises, it’s important to remember to argue in a healthy manner—instead of a demeaning one.
While everyone reacts differently to an argument, it’s up to you and your partner to discern the best way to approach each other. Are you someone who can’t stand when your partner goes off topic when you’re trying to confront the issue? Is your partner someone who would rather have space when he or she is upset? Once you discover the answers to these types of questions, apply what you know and watch every argument afterward be met with compromise instead of confusion.
How And When You Offer Advice
There’s a difference between making decisions as partners and as individuals. For instance, despite the fact that you’re open to your partner’s suggestions on how to handle personal family matters, he or she might feel awkward if you try the same.
Even though offering advice is a form of caring, another way to show your affection is to know when your advice is wanted. Privacy is necessary in every connection, and respecting it ensures the spark continues. It’s important not to take offense or guilt trip your partner if your advice isn’t taken. After all, your partner is not you, and your differences are what make your relationship unique.
The Way You Commit
Similar to how crucial it is to know your partner’s love language, it’s also beneficial to learn what you and your partner define as commitment. Although you may assume this term means exclusivity, your partner may be used to open relationships. Or maybe your partner wants to swap passwords for your social media accounts, but you deem the suggestion as controlling. Occurrences such as these are where being aware of your partner’s boundaries come into play—while feeling violated tends to be a deal breaker in any relationship, knowing where the line is drawn is the way to avoid overstepping it.
The Consistency In How You Communicate
Before you leave your work meeting to find six text messages and an annoyed partner who claims you didn’t reply in a timely manner, it’s wise to discuss your schedules, your preferred way to communicate and your flexibility to do so throughout the day. While your job may allow you access to your phone and computer at all times, your partner may have a career based on customer interaction. Aside from this, some people may wish to constantly interact while others enjoy some time and space alone.
By having a general idea of each other’s communication methods, you’ll be able to find a routine that fits both of you and forget suspicions that can arise from miscommunication.
The Extent Of What You Will Do For Each Other
Doing things you wouldn’t necessarily do if you weren’t with your partner is normal, but sacrificing your morals or what matters to you in order to do those things is negligent. While you may refuse to miss monthly dinner with your best friends for any reason, your partner may have no trouble moving his or her plans with others to see you.
Be open to your significant other about what you’re willing to do for him or her—in general, you don’t always comprehend how important something is to another person, and the only way you’ll know is if you discuss it.