The Zoe Report

9 Totally Plausible Reasons He’s Not Texting Back

We’ve all been there—waiting impatiently for some guy (or girl) to deign to respond to the last text we sent him (or her). It’s a maddening scenario, one that usually results in a powwow with trusted advisers (read: your equally clueless friends) regarding hypotheses for his (or her) ongoing silence. Here, some of the best excuses we’ve come up with during these neurotic brainstorms—none of which are even remotely realistic. Feel free to borrow and apply them to your next encounter with a blank, incoming-text-free home screen, however, in order to feel better about getting ghosted.

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